Want a Jeep?  Prepare for the Inquisition.

"TheCraigy" (TheCraigy) 02/19/2016 at 10:32 • Filed to: None

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So I was browsing inventory on Jeep.com, inquired to a handful of different dealers on specific trucks, and this was one of the first responses I received:

“Hello Craig

When you come to the dealership we will require these things:

Buyer/Co-Buyer 1) Proof of income, a)W2 employees last 3 original paycheck stubs. b)1099 employees last 3 months bank statements or copy of last 2 months pay checks front and bck
Buyer/Co-Buyer 2) Proof of residence, a) Last utility bill, entergy bill, water bill or written lease with name address and phone number of landlord or relative if applicable. b) Date moved into residence
Buyer/Co-Buyer 3) Down payment, either cash or certified funds, (cashier’s check, money order..) No hold checks unless approved by Telecheck - NO EXCEPTIONS.

Buyer/Co-Buyer 4) Proof of Checking/Savings most current statement with name of bank, address and phone number.
Buyer/Co-Buyer 5) 5 references, at least, name address phone number, and zips. (Cannot be at same address must be complete)

Buyer/Co-Buyer 6) A current valid Driver’s license, valid state I.D. or valid United States issued passport.
Buyer/Co-Buyer 7) Full coverage insurance with declaration page showing finance company as lienholder.
Buyer/Co-Buyer 8) Valid e-mail address, land line cell phone and work number and any other applicable numbers
Buyer/Co-Buyer 9) Social Security Card

I am at the dealership every day but Sunday, from the hours of 9:00 to 7:00. Please feel free to contact me here if you have any questions.

Thanks for your time and I look forward to working with you.”

So yeah... I suppose this particular dealer is in a particularly bad neighborhood, but DAMN BRUH. Thought this was worth a chuckle. ;)

64Mali > TheCraigy 02/19/2016 at 10:38

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I think I bought my last car with my ID, and call to the insurance company.

TractorPillow > TheCraigy 02/19/2016 at 10:38

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They require all that for what? Financing? Test drives? Coming inside? This is ridiculous.

Rico > TheCraigy 02/19/2016 at 10:40

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Lmfao are they for real? Where do you live? I’ve never seen some shit like this even at a buy here pay here stealership.

For my car all they did was run my credit and I was on my way. No W2s, paystubs, birth certificate, blood tests etc.

Rico > TractorPillow 02/19/2016 at 10:41

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To steal your identity!

Quadradeuce > TheCraigy 02/19/2016 at 10:42

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That’s more work than my bank required to get a loan to buy an investment property. Crazy.

V8Demon - Prefers Autos for drag racing. Fite me! > TheCraigy 02/19/2016 at 10:44

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Pay stubs and W-2s?! Find another dealer.....

BmanUltima's car still hasn't been fixed yet, he'll get on it tomorrow, honest. > TheCraigy 02/19/2016 at 10:46

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They can legally ask for all that?

MontegoMan562 is a Capri RS Owner > TheCraigy 02/19/2016 at 10:51

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holy shit

How about I walk in and say “My bank will handle the funds”

timgray > TheCraigy 02/19/2016 at 10:52

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Or just go to your credit union, 10 minutes later have a loan in hand, walk into dealer and say, That one for this reasonable price, I have cash.

Tell the guy 30 times, No I dont want super paint protection. No I dont want simonized seats. No I dont want you to wax the gas pedal with special horsepower improving protectant.

Drive away with Jeep, start looking for a good non dealer shop to take care of your jeep.

JawzX2, Boost Addict. 1.6t, 2.7tt, 4.2t > TheCraigy 02/19/2016 at 10:52

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process for buying my last two cars:

1) Tell sales person I’m interested in the 201X XXXX XXXX.

1b) Test drive car (photocopy of driver’s license taken by dealer).

2) Call insurance company, get provisional coverage.

3) Fill out loan paperwork (legal name, ssn, address, phone number, signature)

3b) Decline all the add-on dealer-profit-generation crap.

4) Swipe Visa Debit card for down payment.

4a) Sign over title of trade-in and move all my shit from old car to new car

5) Collect keys and folder of and drive away from dealership in new car.

TractorPillow > Rico 02/19/2016 at 10:53

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The plot thickens!!!

Azrek > TheCraigy 02/19/2016 at 10:54

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Wow...sounds like a conversation I had with an apartment complex as I was moving to Maryland. They wanted 2 pay stubs, a W2 or 1099, energy bill from my previous spot in Florida, Social Security, Driver’s license and passport, and my car information to include insurance coverage.

I told them No as they’d have more information on me than my Stock Broker. I was willing to send pay stubs and Driver’s License and a credit check, but they aren’t getting that much crap for a $1800 a month apartment. Oh, and I have to pay them $50 before they’ll let me know if they have an apartment available. We’re good....

Let me see if I can find that last email exchange...

cazzyodo > JawzX2, Boost Addict. 1.6t, 2.7tt, 4.2t 02/19/2016 at 11:02

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Same. Haha

WiscoProud > TheCraigy 02/19/2016 at 11:13

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Yeah, just based on that email, I would never set foot in the dealership. You just know every step is going to be a pain in the ass and you’ll probably get nailed with bullshit fees.

I have a similar story from a few years ago when I was looking at Jeep Unlimiteds. I found a dealership on the north side of Chicago that had a used black Sahara. The key was I wanted the body color top, not the standard black top. So I called up the dealership to talk about it. First off, they told me the Jeep, despite being advertised as black, was actually dark green (Just as good!), second it did not have the body color top, but “they could always paint it”, lastly, I had to make a specific appointment to see the truck, as the owners wife was driving it and she would need to bring it back. I promptly said “thanks, but no thanks”. If they can’t even be honest about the color, I have no faith in literally anything else they would say.

Short-throw Granny Shifter is 2 #blessed 2b stressed > JawzX2, Boost Addict. 1.6t, 2.7tt, 4.2t 02/19/2016 at 11:21

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Same here, and I remember feeling that it was a major inconvenience that I had to comeback for a second day to pick up the car.

TheRealBicycleBuck > JawzX2, Boost Addict. 1.6t, 2.7tt, 4.2t 02/19/2016 at 11:25

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My experience:

1) E-mail sales person to inquire about the 2014 WRX. Send $100 to hold vehicle for a test drive (last one available in the state).

2) Wife and I drive an hour to get to the dealership to test drive the car. Sales guy rides with me on the test drive.

3) Discuss final price. No need to decline any dealer add-ons because there aren’t any. Agree to price $100 over invoice.

4) No need to call insurance - agent knows I am in the market and my insurance automatically covers new purchases for 10 days.

5) Hand over paperwork for pre-arranged loan.

7) Collect keys and folder of and drive away from dealership in new car.

TheCraigy > Rico 02/19/2016 at 11:32

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New Whaalins brah. It was a first-time experience for me too :)

TheCraigy > BmanUltima's car still hasn't been fixed yet, he'll get on it tomorrow, honest. 02/19/2016 at 11:33

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Legally they can ask for anything they want. Well, almost anything...

Rico > TheCraigy 02/19/2016 at 11:34

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The part that kills me the most are the 5 references. What would they even ask them?

TheCraigy > timgray 02/19/2016 at 11:34

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Exactly. I have a feeling if I walked in there, they wouldn’t be able to comprehend that I’ve already lined up my own financing.

TheCraigy > Rico 02/19/2016 at 11:38

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As if they have some minion who is going to make five phone calls to discuss how good of a guy you are.

My only guess, other than just some particularly disgruntled salesman’s being an idiot (most likely), is that they will have five names and phone numbers of people who might be willing to co-sign your loan.

Tom McParland > TheCraigy 02/19/2016 at 11:39

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So they must get a lot of “credit challenged” customers. FCA dealers in general get a lot of these folks, in some areas more than others.

jmedarts > TheCraigy 02/19/2016 at 11:40

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No one expects the spanish inquistion!

TheCraigy > Tom McParland 02/19/2016 at 11:45

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Most definitely this.

They’re in an area of town affectionately referred to by locals as “DA EAST” and I’d suspect that most of their customers are probably either leasing or financing at a minimum 20% APR.

smobgirl > Rico 02/19/2016 at 12:15

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It’s five more people to call to find you/your money when you don’t pay. My mother somehow got listed for a college friend who never paid their student loans and they harassed her for years.

Rico > smobgirl 02/19/2016 at 12:28

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That is horrible!

ranwhenparked > TheCraigy 02/19/2016 at 19:23

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Yeah, that’s a good sign to walk away, they won’t know how to deal with you anyway.